Wrist Shot
by boopboopglee
Summary: Finn, Rachel and Puck are best friends and move in together. Finn and Rachel love eachother and Puck loves and respects his friends, but he seriously wants them to get together. Future Fic. AU
1. Chapter 1

"Rachel?" Finn said as he opened the door to our new apartment. The apartment was small but had three bedrooms, which we needed, a full bathroom and a half bathroom, a spaceous living room, a dining room, and a nice sized kitchen with new stainless steel appliances, it was a complete steal for the three of us, Finn, Puck and I, and we were happy to have it. "Did you pick your room yet?"

"Nah man, Rachel is downstairs getting more of her boxes, I want the room with the half bathroom though so your room and Rachel's room will have to be right next to each other," Puck said putting the 'kitchen' labeled boxes on the island.

"Don't you think we should give that room to Rach?" Finn suggested while moving boxes to their respective rooms, "she is the only girl, she should get her own bathroom."

"Listen," Puck said, stretching his arms out above his head, "I get it, you are in love with her so-"

"I am not." Finn said quickly, dropping a coffee mug on the island.

"Whatever, well I actually did think about that but I figured that since I have a lot of girls over that it would be better if my room wasn't next to anyone else. That way me and my guests don't keep anyone up. Plus," he added as Rachel tripped through the door with a box that Puck immediately took out of her hands, "i make a mess and I figured it would be easier if you and Rachel shared a bathroom that you both would keep clean, and I could be free to make a mess in mine."

"It's fine, Finn, Noah can have the in-suite bathroom." Rachel said as she swept hair out of her face. "He makes a very valid point. I am not cleaning up his bathroom mess."

Finn half-smiled as Rachel put her hands on her hips and looked around. "I think this is going to be fantastic," she concluded. She walked over to Finn and took the coffee mug he was holding, "Isn't this going to be fantastic?"

"Whe-yeah, for sure," Finn said as he smiled down at Rachel.

Puck laughed at Finn as he walked to put his bathroom products in his bathroom. He was able to see that Finn and Rachel absolutely loved each other, but what he didn't really understand was that they had never gotten enough sense to actually get together, except for that one time senior year when they got drunk and they did the nasty, Rachel lost her virginity to him, and though she wanted to lose it to him, she still cried that they weren't in a relationship and that she was intoxicated at the time.

Puck had dated Rachel for eleven months when they were in high school, Puck definitely had loved her during that time, and she had loved him too, but there was always Finn in the wings for Rachel, and in the end she broke it off with Puck because she couldn't commit herself to him. Somehow, Puck and Rachel were extremely close, they often talked about Finn and about how Rachel had only ever had sex with Finn and Puck, and 'seriously, she needed to get laid.'

It had been Puck's idea to all move in together. He really wanted Rachel and Finn to get together and he wanted them to move in together in the apartment to realize they loved each other. See, Puck was definitely a womanizer, but he had harbored true love for Rachel and wanted to see her happy, especially with Finn, a guy who he felt was like a brother to him.


	2. Chapter 2

I feel like I should have explained this earlier, but I completely forgot to so... here it goes. Rachel, Finn and Puck all live together in an apartment as friends. I am thinking that they are not just out of high school because that makes this kind of weird so, they are not in college, they are 23 year olds and living and working. The apartment is in the city, I'm thinking 'generic city' so think the East Village meets Chinatown and random shots of Lucky Chang's- this is in New York City... eh... the perspective is Rachel's- but if I ever type her name as Rachael do not crucify me.

Thank you to vivilp182 and The Siren of Asianland, you made me remember some stuff I forgot.

Two Weeks In:

"Kurt!" I screamed as I lunged at Finn from across the couch, landing in his lap but I successfully ripped the phone away from his ear, "I missed you so much! You and Mercedes have to come visit as soon as possible so I can show you around, you guys are going to love it here."

"I'm sure we will," Kurt said through the phone, "Did Puck come in yet? I'd like to speak to him."

"Since when do you talk to Noah?" I asked. Regretfully I passed Finn's cell phone to Puck on the couch, but he held the phone away from him.

"What did I do?" he asked as he looked at me while we all heard Kurt yell 'Put the phone to your ear, Puckerman!' through the phone. Noah scrunched his face and put the phone to his ear as he got off of the couch and walked down the small hallway to his room.

"So," I said as I spun around and laid my head in Finn's lap, "Noah is supposed to be having some sort of party tonight with a bunch of people from his investment firm and I was thinking that if you got a few people from the broadcast team-"

"We aren't a broadcast team, we are a broadcasting network, Rach." Finn said playfully as he twirled his fingers through my hair.

"Yeah, yeah, well, if I get people from the theater and you get people from your broadcast network team group club gathering organization assembly congregation league," I said as I gave Finn the stink eye, " we could have a mixer and possibly have a good time."

"You mean you didn't enjoy last weekend?" Finn asked sarcastically. Puck had invited some people over without telling me and Finn and someone threw up in the hallway. Finn literally had to pry some blonde bimbo off of him and lock himself in his room and some guy spilt his drink on me three times before Puck kicked his ass out.

"Don't make a joke about that! It was terrible, I don't know what is worse, that someone threw up in the hallway, that I had to clean it up or that I could see that they had eaten alphabet noodles before they came over." I made a disgusted face while Finn laughed at me. Puck came out of his room and handed the phone to Finn.

"Tell Cher I actually miss him," Noah said to Finn. Finn shook his head 'yes' as he said goodbye to his step brother. Puck then grabbed his coat off of the kitchen table, "I am running to the store to pick up some snacks and beer, do you want to come?" he said looking at me.

"No, I think I will hang back a bit. I like taking the day off on my days off." I said as I sat up and smiled.

Puck took his keys and left leaving Finn and I alone.

"Did you notice that Puck called Kurt Cher?" Finn said after a semi-awkward silence.

I just nodded and laughed, then put my head on the arm of the couch and decided that a nap would be the best option right now.

Later that night-

Finn was flirting with some spinner type boney black haired girl. Ugh! How could he do that right in front of me? He was seriously putting on the moves, he got her a drink, touched her shoulder and was leaning into her while she stood like some wallflower freak. How gross! He doesn't like me but he likes her? Ugh!

"It is okay, Berry." I heard from behind me. Puck was standing with a solo shot cup. I looked at the cup for a moment before looking back at where Finn and Posh Spice had been standing, but they were gone, probably off to fuck. I looked back at the drink and took the shot, deciding that drinking was better than feeling lonely. I took one shot, then two more, then another three before Puck laughed at me and moved the bottle off of the island so I wasn't in arms reach of it.

Puck was so good- he was nice and reliable. He hadn't always been that way but he was my closest companion.

I thought about Finn and Posh Spice and decided I was going to use Puck, perhaps as a distraction or a toy to make Finn angry, but mostly as a person to make me feel like I wasn't alone. I looked at the dancefloor and touched Puck's jaw.

"Do you want to dance with me, Puck?" I said flirtatiously. He looked me up and down and thought for a second before smirking and pulling me by the hip to where people were dancing.

We were dancing dirty and it felt so good.

It felt free.

Puckerman was a good dancer, well I guess grinder. I knew he would be because he was apparently great in bed and this particular dancing is like clothed sex while standing, kind of. I also knew he would not say no to dancing with me because I knew he still liked me, even though subtly.

His hands were everywhere and I turned around to face him. He wasn't Finn. He wasn't anything like Finn, he wasn't what I wanted, but he wanted me and I was looking for company.

He looked really turned on, but I saw a glimmer of sadness in his eyes. I know that he knew I was just looking for a distraction from the hurt I felt from Finn being with that other girl. I needed to ignore it if I was going to have fun tonight, maybe I would even sleep with him. I wasn't sure, I wasn't thinking, but I didn't want to think. I just wanted to forget Finn and remember Puck.

I put my face as close to his as possible without touching his face with mine and moaned quietly. He closed his eyes and brushed his lips against mine gently, perhaps testing the waters. It was weird to see Puck close his eyes when he kissed me but I put my hand on his cheek and he took that as agreement that this was okay.

He tasted just like he did in high school, spearmint and musk, just now it was mixed with a ton of alcohol. I hadn't realized he was drunk when he gave me that first shot but he definitely was, and now so was I.

We stopped dancing completely and started kissing more heavily, he kissed down my neck and stayed there, definitely making his mark, just like he did in high school.

"Hey!" I heard someone say. Then I felt a pull, it was incredibly hard and jarring and the person who pulled me was squeezing so tightly on my arm it scared me. I looked at who had just pulled me away from Puck and scowled.

"Jesus Christ!" Finn said as he tossed me over his shoulder and brought me into the bathroom. "You are fucking wasted, aren't you? What the fuck is wrong with you, Rachel?" He said harshly as he stood me in the tub and turned the shower on. His words had so much bite to them, they were so, Santanaish.

"Ah!" I yelled. I tried to step out of the water but he pushed me back into the direct stream of luke warm water. "Hey! Hey! Stop!"

Finn now had a ton of water on his shirt, looked livid, and pointed at me in a 'stay' gesture. I was cold, wet, no longer buzzed because of my reality shower, and nervous. Puck was standing in the doorway looking at me like a confused drunkard.

"The party is out there," Finn said as he pointed to the crowd all dancing and mingling. "She isn't going to be your party anymore and you sure as fuck aren't going to be hers." Finn said as he closed and locked the door. Then he turned to me.

"Finn, leave me-" I started.

"No." He yelled. It was the way he said it, I guess, that made me not even fight with him about it. He reached around me and turned the shower off. He gave me my favorite towel, pink with gold stars, and sat against the sink. "What the fuck, Rachel?"

"Excuse me?"

"How could you do, do that? With Puck, really? How _mean_ are you?"

"Don't be such a shithead, Finn. You fucked Posh Spice!" I said as I stepped out of the tub. "How dare you try to make me feel bad about my actions when you flirted with that skeleton right in front of me. You suck, Finn."

"Skeleton? Do you mean Jamie? She is a lesbian, we were talking about you!" He said as he ran his hand through his hair. "God damn it!" he yelled again as he swiped the toothbrushes, toothpaste bottle and some of my makeup and his hair brush and comb off of the sink. He moved toward me like he was going to cup my face. "Why?" he spit at me.

I sat on the rim of the tub. "Why?" I repeated back to him. My shoulders slumped. Why? Why.

"Do you love him? Do you want to be with him? Is this what you want to do, Rachel?" He said with so much emotion that if it wasn't so angry it might dissolve to a cry. "Is _he _what you want to do?"

"Puck is a great man." I said trying to defend him.

"You love him. You fucking love him!" Finn yelled.

"No! I just-" I peeped.

"Then tell me why you two were stuck like glue out there."

"You were flirting with her." I said pointedly. I had seen it, I wasn't wrong.

"Yes, Rachel, I was flirting with her. I had full intentions of taking her into my room and bending her over." He said. His words flattened me. Then he stood up. "Is that what you want to hear?" He ran his hands through his hair again. "I don't think about you when I wake up and right before I go to sleep because I want to, I do it because I can't stop it. But, totally, I am such a shallow man that I would be completely enveloped by you for fucking years and forget everything right as some skinny lady walked by me." He opened the door. "I am not that shallow and vapid, Rachel, and if you think I am then I'm not so sure if loving you is worth it for me anymore. " He closed the door.

I waited a minute or too, trying desperately to compose myself. I stood in front of the mirror and wiped my eyes. The door opened and I saw Finn in the reflection of the mirror. He closed the bathroom door and stood.

"Please-" I started as I turned around, but as I did so he grabbed my face and kissed me. It wasn't a soft kiss, it was urgent, it was strong, it was passionate. I felt my knees buckle slightly but he picked me up and sat me on the sink, standing himself between my legs. He kissed me down my neck and onto my shoulder while running his hands up to the top of my thigh and down again before retracing the trail of his lips back up to my mouth.

"Open your mouth." He huskily demanded. I followed his directions and he slid his tongue in. I moaned when our tongues touched. I moaned when I felt his hands brush along my spine, and when he pulled away I tried to pull him back.

He stood me again, and looked at me. Just looked at me. My chest was heaving, I felt tingly everywhere and wanted him to make physical contact with me again.

"He isn't allowed to be the last one to make you moan." He said shortly. I looked hurt, I felt it happen on my face.

I saw him feel bad, then I saw him walk out of the room. I tried to shake it off, shake him off, but I couldn't. He took my heart, I felt like when he inhaled he took my soul, I felt empty.

I stumbled into the hall, then into the living room where the party had just been, but it was gone. Everyone had left and Finn was standing by the sink drinking straight from a bottle of Jack Daniels. Puck was in his room, I heard him rummaging loudly in there.

How could this happen. How could he do that to me? Finn was a dick. I felt like he was a huge asshole. This sucked. It totally sucked.

"Finn?" I said as I planted myself on the opposite side of the island as him. I heard him swallow loudly and he put the bottle down.

"Rachel." he said flatly. How could he have ruined everything? Why was he being so cold? Couldn't he count what happened in the bathroom as a sterling victory for him? He stared at me blankly. I picked up a Solo cup and threw it at him.

"You have fucked everything up." I said as I turned and walked down the hall.

"Rachel!" He yelled. I heard his heavy footsteps behind me, burying me each time I heard them slam against the hardwood floor, and as I opened my bedroom door to hide he caught the doorknob in my hand and pulled the door closed again.

"Leave me alone!" I whined. I heard Puck come out of his room.

"Finn, back off." Puck said as he got between Finn and me. "Rachel, go to bed."

"Rachel!" Finn yelled again.

"You have to calm down." Puck said as I stood with the door just slightly open, making sure nothing got physical.

"No, I do not." Finn said.

"You are going to regret this tomorrow, you are being really nasty, bro." Puck said easily.

"You have her perfume on you, you have her lipstick on you. You have _Rachel_ on you." He said quietly, it sounded like he might cry. "And you gave her a hickey on her neck. You put it on her." He pointed at Puck and took two steps back. "YOU are going to regret this in the morning. You. And it isn't a threat, you just are. You are wrong." Finn turned around and walked down the hall. "And you know what, Puck? The knot in your stomach isn't because you are drunk, it is because you know you fucked up."


	3. Chapter 3

I didn't talk to Finn at all for two weeks. Not a single word, mutter or sound. I barely even saw him to be totally honest and it _killed_ me.

I used Puck's bathroom, ate dinner in my bedroom and tried really hard to give him space, but also to ensure that he didn't come at me and make me feel worse.

I missed him. I thought that I would hate him but I wanted him to look at me. He hurt me too, he hurt me more, he wouldn't even make eye contact with me. He made me want him so much, I wanted him to touch me.

Then I found the silly little note.

I had come home from the theater where I worked with kids that wanted to be actors and singers and had a great conversation with Noah. We talked about what had happened and how it couldn't happen again because if we used each other as weapons against people then we would end up hating each other. Well, then Puck had to go into the office so I went into my bedroom and found a crumpled, scribbly, little piece of paper on my pillow.

**'We could be anything. -F.'**

I knocked on his door quietly.

"Come in." I walked in to see him reviewing some paper with lots of highlights on it. When he saw it was me he put the papers on his desk and stood up. "Hi." I smiled slightly. He looked different. He was wearing a black wife beater instead of a normal shirt and wasn't wearing shoes. He clearly didn't expect me to come to him first.

I never really thought we would get this awkward, Finn and I. I walked into the room and looked around. He had his bed perfectly made and his work desk parallel to the bed. He had a single cowboy from his wallpaper back home framed and hanging behind the desk. There was a tall dresser, a nightstand, and two leather high-backed chairs. I sat in one and watched him as he closed the door. He walked over to the other chair and sat down. "Listen-" he began.

The weirdest thing is that all I wanted was for him to be with me. I wanted to have, well, I wanted to have sex with him. I didn't want to talk really, we were upset with each other and I felt like if we had sex then we could let our frustrations out on each other in an... unconventional way. I felt like I had thought about this forever, but really all he had said was 'listen'.

"Fuck me." I blurted.

"What?" he asked. His eyes got huge and his eyebrows got really high. It was cute. I stood up and leaned over his chair and whispered.

"I want you to. Fuck. Me." I watched his hands grip the arms of the chair and he was on me then.

He didn't bring me to the bed, he pushed me against the door. He literally ripped my shirt off of me and pulled my underwear out from under my skirt all while nipping me. I guess he unbuttoned and pulled his pants down enough to get his junk out but I didn't notice when he did it. He picked me up and hit me against the door and slid into me, which I did not expect so quickly and moaned quite loudly.

He pushed into me like he was programmed to do only this task. He tucked his head into the crook of my neck and thrust into me. I gripped the back of his head, feeling him breathing down my neck and chest. My head pressed against the door, eyes closed, biting my lip while he did exactly what I wanted him to.

We didn't speak, we didn't kiss, we didn't pretend to comfort one another. We took what we needed, we took ourselves back from one another. I knew his eyes were closed, though I couldn't see his face. I heard his breathing pick up and assumed he was getting close.

"God. Yes." I hummed quietly as he plunged harder and harder. I was going to cum before he was. I was so close and gyrating against his deep and erratic thrusts when he whispered "Oh, Rach." . I don't know if he was saying it for me, his voice was so low and meek, but it worked for me.

I toppled over the edge. I gripped at the back of his head, his back and settled at his shoulders. I gripped them as he continued to pump as I rode out my climax and he found his own.

When we finished he didn't kiss me, tell me it was everything he wanted or anything I first imagined would happen. He lifted his head from my shoulder, let me go to stand and rested his head against the door. His hands held me at my hips and my hands remained their position at his shoulders. I put my face in his chest, inhaling him as much as I could before whatever was going to happen next happened.

We just stood there. His heart was beating so quickly, but I'm sure mine was too. Who was going to talk first?, I thought.

"Have you been with him the way you are with me?" Finn asked quietly. He didn't sound bitter or mean, he sounded scared. I took a few seconds before I answered him. I knew he meant Noah but as the suspense of my answer built his breathing hitched and his grip on my hips tightened slightly.

"No, I have only ever been with you." I finished by kissing right between his pecks. "Have you been with anyone else?"

I felt him shake his head no. he took a deep breath before adding, "I wouldn't want to."

It was better, the air around us. it was... perfect. I moved my hands and moved to wrap them around his neck as he moved his hands up and we hugged. He held me so tightly, it was perfect.

"I miss you." He whispered.

" Me too. What do we do now?"

"Well, it depends on you but honestly, I think if you try to tell me we have to be just friends I might move." I shifted uncomfortably. "Rach, I am just kidding."

"Well, I want to keep this," I said gesturing between him and I. "Finn, we can't tell anyone."

"Why?"

"I don't want anyone to know about this. They will feel they have some sort of right to meddle and they don't and," I moved my hands to his neck and looked him in the eyes, "i want to fuck you a lot."

"Puck can't know." Finn stated matter-of-factly.

"Exactly."

"Are we friends with benefits?"

"Well, yeah." I smirked. "I was serious." he smirked at me and picked me up and placed me on the bed. He pulled his shirt over his head and pushed his pants off.

"I am keeping this," he said as he took off my bra. "And the thong too." I laughed. Then he did exactly what I said to, but he kissed my body.

The unspoken rule was that we wouldn't kiss each other on the lips. It was a weird thing that we didn't want to do while we remained friends with benefits. It was easier this way, and god damn did it feel good.


	4. Chapter 4

It was 4:30pm and Noah and I were preparing dinner for our guests. Finn's mom, step-dad and Kurt were expected to get off of the plane at 3:30pm and Finn had to pick them up from the airport. We were making pork chops, mashed potatoes, salad, carrots and peas for dinner and Finn had prepared the pork chops in the oven hours ago and it was cooking in the oven.

Noah and I worked mostly in silence. We had been able to skirt around everything lately, keeping the conversation light and mellow. We were both really excited to have Finn's family come to visit with us, they were basically our family too.

"Have you two started talking again?" Noah asked me as he peeled potatoes for dinner while I made a salad.

"Yeah, we sort of decided to take it slow. We can't really live together and not speak, ya know? It makes everything awkward for us," I looked at Noah and he was nodding while peeling his potatoes, "awkward for you. Anyway, we are too good of friends to stop talking over something like that."

"Something like that." Noah repeated. "Something like me and you together?" Noah had stopped working on the potatoes but he remained looking at the bowl where the potato skins lay.

"Noah, not like that. It isn't worth it to fight when we were together drunk and me angry with Finn and trying to make him angry. We talked about this. We tried to be together in high school and Finn was okay with it then. I shouldn't have said it that way. I'm sorry." I looked over at him, he took a deep breath, shook his head slightly and continued his work on the potatoes.

"When is everyone getting home, anyway?" Noah said, changing the subject.

"Um, the flight was set to land an hour ago, they should be getting in soon." I smirked lightly, I was excited to see everyone. I really missed them.

"What are the sleeping arrangements? Do you know?" Noah asked.

"Um, Carol and Burt are sleeping in my room and you, me, Kurt and Finn have to figure it out."

"I do not want to stay with Finn, we aren't really talking." Noah said quickly. "While I'm sleeping he might throw me into a shower."

"Relax. We will figure something out. Maybe if Kurt sleeps with Finn then,"

"Won't work- Kurt crushed on Finn, that is too weird for everyone." 

"Well then I guess you have to sleep with Kurt and I will sleep with Finn." 

"That is a terrible plan." Noah laughed. "Kurt does not like me."

"Do you have a problem sleeping in the same room as Kurt?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Not at all. I am comfortable in my heterosexuality, baby. As long as he doesn't feel weird about it everything will be fine." Noah winked.

We continued to work in happy conversation until everyone arrived around 5:00pm.

"Wow, those pork chops were delicious, Rachel, thank you." Carol said as she pushed her plate back.

"Oh, I didn't make them." I said as I nodded toward Finn. "Finn did."

"Since when did you learn to cook?" Burt asked.

"Rach taught me. I can't survive if I can't eat." Finn laughed.

"I, personally, think the mashed potatoes were the absolute best ever," Noah said as he put his arms behind his head," And that is not because I made them." Everyone laughed.

A little bit later I showed Carol and Burt to my, I mean their room.

"Here you go, guys." I said as I ushered them into the room. "Goodnight, if you need anything, let any of us know."

As I walked into the living room I heard Kurt ask the same question that Noah had asked earlier. Who was going to sleep where.

"Noah and I talked about this earlier," I said as I walked to the fridge, took out a beer, opened it and took a sip. "We figured that if you slept with Noah and I slept with Finn then that would be the easiest."

"Oh," Finn said quickly. "Are you okay with that Kurt?" he said as I sat on the couch between Noah and Kurt, with Finn next to Kurt. All of us had beer, except for Kurt, who had wine.

"I'm fine with that. I would never make a move on _him_ anyway. So not my type." Kurt said as he took a long swig of his wine.

"That's okay, Cher, I think you are pretty pretty." Noah said jokingly.

We continued to talk until Kurt realized it was three am and decided to bitch at everyone until we all got up to go to sleep.

When Finn and I got into his bedroom we laid in his bed and said goodnight. Then I felt his hand. It crept up my thigh and into my panties.

"Finn." I whispered.

"What?" He whispered back playfully.

"Did you lock the door?" He mhmed a reply as he pulled his shirt over his head and I did the same. His fingers resumed their position at my entrance and he started teasing. He played for a while, until I couldn't stand it anymore and I whispered against his neck "get in me, Finn."

We made sure we made almost no noise, but both had our fun. We had to remember to put our clothes back on because people might find it odd that we both sleep naked, ya know.

In the morning I was the second one up. Kurt was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee and a Vogue.

"Good morning, Rachel." Kurt said, barely looking at me. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah. How about you?" I said as I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat across from him at the table.

"Puckerman snores." Kurt said while rolling his eyes. He looked at me for a long moment, then smirked.

"What?" I said self-consciously.

"Well, miss thing, you have a hickey on your neck that you didn't have yesterday. You and Finn are bucking and he gave you a hickey." Kurt whispered while smiling.

"What? No." I said touching my neck.

"Oh really? Did you fall and hit your neck on a doorknob this morning?" Kurt asked sarcastically.

"Ugh..." I touched my neck again. "Help me hide it? Noah can not know."

Kurt smiled widely. "I always knew you two would get it on, and sure thing. The fact that this is a secret is all the more intriguing."


	5. Chapter 5

"It is really easy to get into relationships like what you two are in really quickly and then suddenly feel like you are drowning." Kurt's voice crackled through the phone. "I really think that you and my dear, dim-witted brother need to talk about it."

"I don't want to talk about it. How do I bring that up to him?" I said as I bit off a piece of carrot. "Hey, Finn how are you doing? Why did you tell me you loved me?"

"It wasn't like he walked up to you and professed his love for you. He had just cum, he was disoriented., and all high on feeling good. You guys have been doing this for, what, three months? He is getting loose lipped with you, I guess."

"I know, but I still think it is weird that 'I love you' comes out of his mouth when he feels good."

"Then maybe you should say just that."

"Kurt! You are not"- Finn walked in the door. "helping me like you are supposed to!" I said jokingly as I nodded my head at Finn to say hello.

"Is that my brother?" Finn yelled at the phone. "Why don't you ever call me!"

"Well, Rachel I am going to let you go deal with your problems with loverboy." Kurt said. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight Kurt."

I got off of the phone and looked at Finn. He had perched himself to sit on the island, and was staring at me with an apple in hand.

"Where is Puck?" He asked as he bit into the apple.

"He is staying at some girl's house tonight. He won't be back until maybe tomorrow night. He told us not to assume he is dead or anything." I walked into the bathroom and heard Finn follow me.

"So," he said with a smirk. I looked in the mirror above the sink and watched as he pushed my hair to the side and began kissing my neck. "Finn." he 'mmmed' a response, spun me around to face him, and began crawling his hands up my shirt.

"We need to talk about some stuff." I said as I angled my head so he would have better access to my neck.

"Not now. No talking now. Just be with me." He whispered.

That was the end of that conversation.

We fucked. We fucked on the bathroom sink. We _totally_ fucked on the bathroom sink. Then we fucked against the wall right outside of the bathroom. We fucked in his room, in my room and then on the island. I loved it. He loved it.

"That was-" he started.

"so amazingly rough." I said as I put my arms above my head and stretched. He kissed my right above my bellybutton. Then right below my bellybutton. "Do you have a big shirt I could wear right now?"

"Sure." He went to get me a shirt. I jumped off the island and put my leg up on the island and stretched. He was rough and I did not want to get sore. I didn't know what to do- but I figured maybe stretching would help. I moved to put my other leg on the island and stretched.

"I love this." Finn said. I looked at him. He had put boxers on and was staring at me, stretching naked with a tee shirt in his hands.

"Shirt!" I yelled as I put my leg down and put my hands out to catch it as he threw it at me. I put it on and opened the fridge. Finn came up behind me and kissed right behind my ear.

"this," he said as he kissed there again. "is my favorite spot. I love this spot." I liked when he touched me, but I hated the weird and awkward feeling that emerged immediately when he was out of me. This situation was horribly confusing.

We are friends that fuck and I love him and he just fucks me and this sucks. I don't want anyone to know that this is happening. This kind of makes me feel ashamed. We live together- everyone is going to think that we moved in with each other specifically to fuck. And Puck! What about poor Puck? He can never know.

This has to be defined as something and there has to be something changing, I decided.

"What are we doing?" He stilled instantly. "I like it but what _are _we doing?"

"We are-" He began, I spun around to face him. "Making lo-"

"love? You use that word a lot, love."

"Well- I don't know. This is a weird thing to ask, Rach. You know what we are doing. You know what this is."

"We are friends with benefits." I stated. He looked me right in the eye. "we have sex but"

"But?" He stepped back and put his hands up in a defensive reaction. "Why are you ruining this?" He furrowed his eyebrows. "I love this, I love doing this with you."

"love, love, love. What the hell is with you and that word?"

"Are you kidding me?"

"Stop using the word love. I fuck you. You fuck me. We don't make love. Saying that we make love when we fuck in secret is wrong."

"Well," he put his hands down and gave me a dirty look. "I think we should quit being so secretive about this so that we can do this right."

"It is a secret, it is supposed to be secretive." we stared awkwardly at each other. "I-We don't want anyone to know."

"I don't have a problem if people know. You do." he stared at me. "Right?"

"Yes. I don't want Pu-people to know we are fuck buddies."

"Puck? Did you just say Puck?" His eyes squinted. "What the fuck is up with the two of you. Are you fucking him too? Because I am not cool with that at all and I swear to god if you and he are fucking I am going to flip shit."

"We aren't...and I didn't say Puck. Besides, even if we were doing it, it wouldn't be-"

"I swear to god Rachel if you say it wouldn't be any of my business."

"It wouldn't be!" He swiped the fruit basket off of the island.

"Oh my god, Rachel!" He yelled. "How would it not be my business? He would be having sex with you!"

"So? I am having sex with you and it is none of his business! He can't know about us. It is basically the same thing."

"What would you do if Puck found out? What would you do if I told him." He said the words with a hard edge, somewhat testing me. I walked into the hallway and put on my booty shorts as he said this.

"I would end this." I answered honestly. "It wouldn't be because it was Puck"

"That is bullshit." Finn pounded his fist on the island.

" It'd be because he lives with us."

"Bullshit! You like him."

"No, I don't! Stop doing this!" Every time he would make a step away from me I would mimic it and recapture the space between us. "Stop making me pick between you and Noah! You two are my best friends! Puck never makes me pick between you and him. You constantly do!" Finn spun around and gestured between he and I.

"We are _not_ just friends! We have sex! We are intimate with one another."

"And I had a relationship with Noah! I was intimate with him too!"

"You never loved him completely. You never _made_ love to him. You never physically expressed how deeply you loved him. You never loved him enough to love him with love making. _We_ are more intimate than you and he were."

"Maybe so. But if I fucked him tomorrow people would be less surprised than if they found out that I was sleeping with you because he and I had a physical relationship before!"

"He never loved you! You never loved him!"

"I loved him as much as I could!" I stepped toward Finn and pushed him as hard as I could in the chest, though he didn't move. I pushed him again. "How dare you try to comprehend my feelings about love. You don't know anything about love! You are never with a girl for longer that 2 weeks. You don't spend nights out. YOU don't love. You are incapable of it or something. You don't love _anything!_"

"You loved him as much as you could? That is such bullshit. And you know I love other things."

"Fuck you, Finn." I pushed him again. "I loved him as much as I could! It wasn't his fault I had other feelings for... someone else. And he loved me anyway. He loved me and only loved me. He still says it!" there was an awkward tension between us. Although honestly I didn't expect a single thing else.

"He never loved you as much as I did. He never loved you as much as I do. And you pick him over me constantly. Forever, you have picked him over me."

"What?"

"When it boils down to it you two made out and were all over each other. I flirted with a lesbian who was talking about how attractive _you_ are. He always wins and I always lose."

"I am not a game! Stop treating me like one!" I went into my room and got dressed. I packed my purse with enough stuff to make it through one night away. As I walked out of my room I saw Finn standing above the kitchen sink, hands on the counter. I could see the tension tight in his back muscles.

"I don't understand a thing you do Rachel." he said without turning to look at me. "I took your virginity. We are intimate with one another in a way that only you and I have been together. But you are-"

"You never took my virginity, I gave it to you. Don't mistake that." I said flatly.

He turned and saw me standing with my hand on the doorknob. "You're leaving?"

"I'll call tonight to say I'm safe." He walked toward me quickly.

"Don't leave." I quickly walked out the door. "Rachel, don't leave. Please do not leave!"

"No." I pressed the button into the elevator and got in. He stood at the opened door, keeping his hand on the door jam of the elevator so that it could not close.

"Get out of the elevator. Rachel, a fight is one thing, leaving is another. Do not leave. We can talk it out like we always-"

"Move your hand, Finn."

"Don't leave. I would never leave you like this."

"For the fucking love of God, Finn. Move your fucking hand!" I tried to push him away so the door would close. It didn't work.

"No."

"I never ask you for anything!" I shouted. "I do not want to be around you. I want to be away from you right now. Move. Your. Fucking. Hand." He listened, looking hurt, and moved his hand. I exhaled. The door began to close, but it felt like it was closing in slow motion. We made complete eye contact as the doors slowly closed.

"Please don't leave me." he whispered.

Those were the last words we said. Then the elevator door shut.


	6. Chapter 6

**ATTENTION: Here are some mistakes I made. Despite what I said in chapter one, for the sake of the storyline Rachel has only had sex with Finn, she never had sex with Puckerman.**

I guess Finn was right. Maybe I did love Puck. I needed to figure out exactly what my feelings were for Noah before I could figure anything out with Finn. I took out my phone and dialed his number but got his cell phone's answering machine.

"Puck? Can you pick up the phone please?" I said into the answering machine. I know he was with some girl but I really needed to talk with him.

My brain was racing. Finn had made some seriously valid points. Why did it matter what Puck thought and why in the hell would I feel the need to keep this secret so tightly under wraps. It was obvious to me, and perhaps more importantly, Finn that there was something weird between Puck and I.

I had been with Puck. I couldn't bring myself to be with him completely ever-but so quickly I had given everything to Finn. Puck understood that he wasn't supposed to be with me, and even when we were in high school he knew I was supposed to end up with Finn.

In a moment of salvation my phone rang and **Puck **up on the caller ID.

"Hey? Hey, babe is everything okay?" He said sounding concerned.

"I need to see you right now. Where are you? I can meet you somewhere."

"Sure, how about the coffee shop by that studio we went to when we first moved here."

"How long will it take you?"

"Um, give me ten minutes. Okay?"

"Fine. See you in te-"

"Rach, is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just need to straighten my shit out."

"Hang in there, I'll be there soon."

I waited for twenty minutes, sitting on the stoop of Studio Karma. It smelled like thai food- of which I was not a fan.

"Hey!" I heard a voice yell. I turned my head to see Puck jogging across the street to me, a messanger . I was going completely on feeling and whim.

"Hi." I said and I stood up. When he reached me he put a hand on my arm.

"Babe, is everything okay?" I didn't answer. I kissed him. I kissed him with all of the passion that I felt should have been there. It should have been the stuff of storybooks, right? We had been high school sweethearts. He kissed back hesitantly, and it felt...like the shoe was two sizes too small.

I pulled back and he blinked at me.

"What did you feel like?" I said breathlessly.

"It felt like you are trying to figure your shit out." He smirked and sat on the stoop. "Don't get my wrong, Ladyberry, I like, _love_ kissing you, because it is nostalgic, but it was different this time."

"What do you mean?" I sat down next to him. "It felt different this time? What the _hell_ does that mean?"

"I... Rachel. Can I ask you a question without you freaking out and being a diva?"

"Sure."

"Is this about Finn?" I rolled my eyes. This damn Puckhead knew me so well. I huffed.

"Yes."

"Rachel. Can we get a little off topic for a second- I need to talk about a problem Kurt is having."

"He didn't tell me he had any troubles."

"Well, he is. Let me explain. Do you remember that kid Blaine who he loved in highschool but they never got together even though it was obvious to everyone else that they should have, and they spent, like, years snuggling together on Friday and Saturday nights? Well Blaine made it seem like it was only because he was friends with Kurt and that he had no feelings at all for him. And remember when Blaine went out with Kurt's best friend CJ?"

"Yeah."

"Remember how it hurt Kurt so much but he couldn't say anything because, even though he like, loved Blaine he didn't want to ruin what he had. If he couldn't have it his ideal way he was going to take it any way he could because... for Kurt just being friends was better than nothing."

"Yeah? Get to the problem and not the history."

"Well, Blaine was mad at Kurt and he hooked up with CJ in front of him. It kind of broke the last straw for him. Remember when he would ask for me on the phone? That was about this. Do you think that Kurt should be pissed at Blaine?"

"Absolutely pissed. That is SO not right to fuck with poor Kurt's head like that. Ugh, Kurt should really just own what he is feeling because Blaine really likes him too and Blaine needs to do the same because games do _not_ work."

"Oh yeah?" Puck started laughing.

"What are you laughing at, crazy?"

"That didn't happen to Kurt, I made it up." I slapped Puck's arm.

"That's not right. Way to make up stories, you boob."

"Well, it had a point." He put his arm on my shoulder. "Kurt is Finn, you are Blaine, and I am CJ."

"Are you kidding me?" I was so...grounded right then. "I am really mean to Finn."

"And you love him completely." Puck nudged my shoulder. "I, although I can honestly say that I love you Rachel, want to see you happy- it isn't with me. I am your nice, big distraction from Finn because he is too shy about his feelings and you are confused."

"I'm a bitch."

"Only sometimes." He winked at me. He stood up and started walking away. "You know what you need to do."

"Puck? Wait!" I walked up to him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you."

"Get 'em Ladyberry." He kissed me on the cheek and backed up. "I am going to go back to Natasha's house. She is _smokin'._"

"Have fun." I said winking.

I walked slowly back to the apartment. The air felt crisper, but it was easier to breathe.

When I got home I stood outside of the apartment room door for a really long moment. Slowly I slid my key into the lock and entered.

Finn was sitting at the kitchen table on his laptop. He looked at me as I stood in front of the door. Well, really he stared. His eyes were slits, he was being critical.

I took my coat off, put my bag down and walked a few steps toward him.

"Finn. I-"

"Rachel." Finn said as he stood from his laptop and walked toward me. "I have never don-"

"Let me talk." I said in a 'listen to me!' tone.

I walked up to him so that we were standing really close to one another. I could feel him breathing.

"I love you." I said.

I closed the gap between us. I kissed him and he kissed back. He wrapped his fingers in my hair and I pressed up against him.

"I love you." He kept whispering between kisses. When Finn finally stepped away he was flush. "We really need to talk though."


	7. Chapter 7

"I love you." He kept whispering between kisses. When Finn finally stepped away he was flush. "We really need to talk though."

"Okay." I said, also out of breath. He let go of me and walked back over to his computer.

"I am not going to let you screw with me anymore." He sat at the table. "You can't fool around with Puck, or anyone else. You can't decide while we are fighting that you want to hide in your bedroom, don't do it because I wouldn't do it to you." He took a deep breath. "If you decide that us being together- and we are together- is not what you want anymore then you need to tell me."

"Okay."

"If you hurt me I can't be with you anymore." He looked at me for a moment as I absorbed his words.

"I won't hurt you." I took a slow step forward then went to him. I straddled him in the chair. I moved in to kiss him but he held my head a few inches away.

"Do you think that you and I being together is productive? Or are we just going to hurt ourselves? And each other?" He searched in my eyes for an answer.

"I want to be with you." His lips became a hard line, I could tell that he was thinking about us fighting. "Finn, I'm sorry."

"Rachel." He moved his hands from my face to my shoulders. "I begged you."

"I'm so sorry." I hadn't realized that I was on the verge of tears, but when one slipped out I tried to turn my face away but he held me steady.

"I don't want you to cry about _anything_ unless they are tears of happiness." He wiped the tears away and kissed my nose. "We have a long way to go, right?"

"I know."

"We will do this." Finn smirked. "I love you."

"I love you too." I said. He smiled completely then and I got off of him. "Hey Finn?" I asked as I walked slowly down the hallway.

"Yeah?"

"Can you please make love to me?" Finn didn't answer but he ran toward me. He grabbed me from behind and kissed my neck.

He pushed us through my bedroom door and we stood, attached to one another, by my queen sized bed. He pulled my shirt off and I turned around to face him. I took his shirt off and kissed his chest. He and I had gotten matching small tattoos when we were both eighteen, his on his left peck and mine right above my Achilles tendon. They said 'music'. I kissed his tattoo. I continued to kiss his chest as I unbuckled and unbuttoned his pants and pushed them down.

Finn picked me up and put me on the bed and crawled over me.

"Let's get these off." He said lightly as he pulled my jeans off. We were both in our underwear, we have never fooled around with clothes on before, we usually just ripped the clothes off as quickly as possible and got it in, but today, every time we made eye contact Finn would kiss me on the lips.

He flipped us over so that I was on top and unhooked my bra. He began sucking on my left nipple and I started moaning. I had always tried to keep as quiet as possible- it felt nice to be able to let go. I wrapped my fingers in his hair and brought his face back up to mine. I kissed him really hard- I felt him grow underneath me and I moaned.

I rolled off of him and took off my underwear, I then pulled his off. I reclaimed my place on top of him and swiftly dropped myself onto him. I moaned his name. Finn clutched my hips and I did it again- I picked myself up and dropped onto him, he went deeper this time.

"Augh, Finn!" I moaned loudly.

Finn held tightly on my hips and, as I tried to pick myself up again, he stilled me.

"Just," His eyes were closed, breathing heavy, and he swallowed. "Give me a second." Finn hadn't really had a mailman type problem since high school, and it was funny to see how he did now- I twas like we were in high school.

I felt his grip lessen, and took it as permission to repeat my actions. As he went completely inside of me again I clawed into his shoulders.

"_Rach._"

His eyes shut even tighter and he made a 'ugeh' noise. I felt him quiver, and release.

"Rachel, I just-"

"I know." I ran my fingers through his hair. I moved to pick myself up off of him, but he 'nnnn'ed in disapproval.

"Wait." After a few moments he nodded. "We aren't done." He opened his eyes and looked at me. He flipped us over so that he was on top and he rammed into me. My headboard hit the wall.

He continued to enter me roughly and passionately and it felt euphoric.

"Oh, Finn. Ohhhh uhh, yes, oh. There. _Ffffuck._" I tried to keep eye contact with him but my eyes kept shutting. I grabbed his head and brought it to mine. We kept our lips touching, but the noises we were both making made us not really kiss, just have our lips touch.

"Rachel." He grunted. Whenever he said my name it made me crazy.

"Finn, oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, uhh," My fingers found their way into his hair again. "Fuck me, uhh, oh, baby baby- harder." Then it happened. I released. "Finnn."

He pumped only a few moments before he found his second release. He put his face in the crook of my neck and we just laid there, him still inside of me, and us wrapped up in each other.

"You are," He said to me, "incredible."

"I love you."

"Are you two done?" We heard from the living room? "You left the door to Rachel's room open and I'm afraid to walk past."

"Puck?" I yelled.

"Yeah."

"Puck!" Finn yelled as he lifted his head up. "I am dating Rachel, I love her and she loves me and...yeah."

"I can hear that." Puck yelled back sarcastically. Finn dropped his head back to where it had been in the crook of my neck.


	8. Night RachFinn lost their vcards

"What if I told you that I was not a virgin?" I said in a haze. Finn and I had been drinking heavily after he won a football game and got the game ball. We were laying in my backyard on a blanket Finn had laid out. My dads weren't home- they were never really home.

Finn lifted his head off of the blanket, took a long swig out of our communal booze glass and concluded. "Well, I would say you were a liar."

"How would you know?" I said as I grabbed the glass out of his hands. He was drinking more out of it than I was, I wanted to drink a lot too. "It isn't like I would tell you or anything."

"Puck would have told me."

"What if I told him not to ell you? Huh? Maybe Puck and I had secretly been having sex for months, he taught me everything he knew and now I just walk around being an undercover sexual goddess." I nodded, content with my completely fabricated story and took three big gulps from the cup. "We are running out of drink."

"Rachel?" Finn said taking the cup and finishing its contents. "Did you and Puck have lots of sex?"

"No." I laughed and looked at the empty glass. I laid back down on the blanket and rolled until I was on the grass. It was dewy. "We are going to graduate, Finn. I want to know that I was special in high school."

"You were the specialist in high school." He repeated like a parrot, then blubbered a drunken cackle. "Is that what I'm supposed to say? I have no idea what I am supposed to tell ya. I think that you are super special, Rach. You are the only one of us in this school thats perfect-o. Your specialness doesn't end in hig-shss school. I love knowin ya, it makesss me feel more successsy." He finished by standing, wobbling and sitting back down on the blanket.

"Huh." I might be super drunk but my brain knew that his language skills were ridiculously impaired. I put my face in the ground. "Hey Finn! Do this! It smells good!" I huffed grass/dirt smell for a few more minutes before I picked my head up.

"Rachel?" I picked my head up to see Finn standing with no shirt on. "I...lost my shirt off of my body. I think someonebody stole it. What are you deewwing down there? You look dead! There is ssshit on your pretty little face."

"I don't know."

"Can I kiss you?" Finn dropped to his knees and flipped me over. He kissed me softly on the mouth. It sent electric shock waves through me. It lingered for a moment before he backed away.

"I want to sleep with you. Do you want to sleep with me?" I stood up and walked toward my backdoor.

"I'm coming!" He yelled. I threw off my shirt and walked into my house. I turned the wall light on, although it seemed to move and I was confused for a minute or too. "Wow. You can totally tell my dads are gay. This place is decorated perfectly!" I turned around to see Finn coming up the steps into the house. "My room is up here!" I walked up the stairs to my bedroom.

"I am going to have sex with you!" Finn cheered. When he entered the room he unbuttoned his pants and kicked them off along with his shoes.

"Let's do it!" I said as I pulled my shorts off and kneeled on my bed. "Wait! I need a condom!"

"I don't have one!" Finn yelled like he was being attacked. I had a pack in my bedside dresser and took one out. "Oh, thank goddsh. I'm glad you have these." He took the condom out of my hand, took off his underwear and put it on. "It is good I can do this. I want to have sex with you."

"How do you know how to do that?" I pulled off my underwear and looked at him.

"I used to steal P-p-p-uckaamens and put em on in his bathroom. His motha yellelled at him cause she thought he was a manwhore." He giggled. I unclipped my bra and stood on my knees. Finn blinked. "Those are your boobs!" he yelled as he pointed at them.

"That is your...your...your..." I stared at it. It seemed like it was too big to fit inside of me.

"Oh, this is my penis." he said, openly gesturing to his erect...unit.

"Hi, Penis!" I waved. "Are we going to have sex? I am getting sleepy."

"Oh, okay. Let's do it!" Finn pulled me by the leg toward him and maneuvered me to lay beneath him on the bed. He leaned down and kissed me on the nose.

"Come on, do it!" I whined.

"Rachel?" Finn said, looking at me with hooded eyes. "I'm nervous." he put his hands on my hips and stared into my own drunk eyes.

"Me too." I confessed. Finn took a deep breath in. "Are you all ready setty?"

"Uh huh." he pushed toward me then entered. He moaned loudly and closed his eyes. "You're in!" I yelled happily. "Welcome to ccccclllluuubbbb Rachel! Population: You!"

He smirked and continued thrusting, after a few seconds it wasn't a joke anymore- it was pleasure. We moaned and kissed and nibbled.

"Mailman, mailman, mailman." Finn whispered. I thought he was just being kinky.

"Oh mailman!" I said as I bucked my hips up to meet his still ones. "Yes! Deliver my mail!" Finn snapped his eyes open and made his mouth an 'o' shape.

"Ngggh." He groaned. Then looked at me, his penis inside of me, then me again. "I think we are done... I'm really sorry. I...I just came."

"Okay." I said nuzzling my head into my pillow. Finn rolled off of me, got up and cleaned himself up in the bathroom. He came back into bed with me and laid down.

"Can we cuddle?" He asked.

"Sure." he spooned me and we fell asleep together, naked.

The next morning when I woke up there was a huge tree branch on my waist...wait...oh...SHIT.

"Finn!" I said frantically as I pushed his shoulder. He stirred then became conscious.

"Why am I naked?" he said as he rubbed his eyes, then he looked at me. "I had sex with you didn't I."

"We are both naked, so I guess." I got up and walked, stark ass naked into the bathroom.

"Can we talk about this?" Finn asked sitting up and rustling his hair.

"No, but we were safe, you left the condom in my sink."

"What? I'm sorry!" Finn grabbed his boxers and walked into the bathroom, picking up the condom and trashing it. "You don't want to talk about this?"

"My head really hurts and I just want some coffee. Thanks for offering though Finn." On the inside I was about to cry though.

"I think I should leave." Finn found his pants and shoes but not his shirt, kissed the top of my head and left.

"I'm calling Puck- this is bullshit." I said to myself as I crawled back into bed in my fluffy robe.

When I heard the dial tone I breathed in a sigh of relief.

"Hey babe." Puck said through the phone.

"I fucked Finn and I can't remember it, but I'm sore and I have a headache so I know I fucked him."

"Sit on peas or something, i'll be right there." With the click of the call ending I started to cry.

"I have been a virgin forever," I said to myself. "I can't even remember a life changing experience."

When the doorbell rang I got it, it was Puck-naturally. He had a gallon if ice cream, raw cookie dough and two dvd boxes.

"Hi." I said, sniffling. "I think I am an alcoholic."

"Naaaah." Puck said, kissing my cheek. "You are just a bad drinker." As he set his things on the table in the living room I heard him whisper 'i'm glad it wasn't me to take her virginity. That'd be aaawwwkkkwwward' to himself.

"Okay, Berry. Come here." He said opening his arms. He pulled me into a hug and let me cry while he, although he looked like he would rather skin himself alive, watched Never Been Kissed with me.

"I hate booze." I said like a child.

"Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-a-a-alcohol." He quipped.


End file.
